


Love Map

by dark_as_a_tomb



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Breeding, Case Fic, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Emotionally Repressed, Knotting, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mentions of Breeding, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Past Drug Addiction, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Smut, Suicidal Thoughts, mentions of mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:34:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25707502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dark_as_a_tomb/pseuds/dark_as_a_tomb
Summary: Dr. Spencer Reid always prided himself on being objective and neutral, despite his omega status. That was until he was kidnapped and drugged. Suddenly, he had no control over anything anymore - his body, his mind, or his instincts. And he definitely wasn't in control of the way he now viewed his Alpha best friend, Derek Morgan.
Relationships: Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid
Comments: 36
Kudos: 470





	1. Chapter 1

Dr. Spencer Reid had always prided himself on being a neutral force. He used intellect to guide his decisions, and he was not the impulsive type. He spent years suppressing his omega instincts. With his eidetic memory and 187 IQ, it was hard to compartmentalize his strong intellect with his strong emotional omega. So instead of finding a compromise: he simply suppressed his omega. He was stubborn and he knew what happened to omegas in the world – they were mated young, forced to stay at home, pleasing their alphas and raising the pups. And that wasn’t what he wanted – he knew that he had a gift that needed to be used. And he wanted to be independent.

So, he ignored all alphas. He ignored their advances and stuck his nose in a book. He took his lunch to the library every day in middle school and high school. He never had many friends because he was so much younger than everyone else. When he was a senior, he was technically younger than the entire freshman class. He suppressed his emotions and ignored everything, getting drunk on coffee and studying for days at a time without sleep. He suffered through heats that he ignored until the heats lessened and went away. He didn’t use EH, even though he knew it was dangerous. He didn’t even use suppressants. At this point in his life, after nearly two decades of ignoring his instincts, they ignored him.

Was he happy? No. But he was managing. And he’d rather be managing with his three Ph.D.s and his coveted spot on the Behavior Analysis Unit in the FBI than be at home waiting for an alpha to come home so he could present himself.

But something changed.

When Tobias Hankel kidnapped Spencer, he had nothing to do but sit there. Tobias was nice to him. They were friends. Tobias would bring him food. Tobias would revive him when the alternate personality of his father would choke Spencer out or waterboard him. Tobias was the one who gave him the mind-numbing drugs before his father came out to beat him senseless. He would render the genius useless, so his father could untie him, whip him, beat him until he passed out.

It was the worst type of Stockholm Syndrome. The drugs stopped the pain. And soon Spencer found himself looking forward to the floatiness. His brain was constantly running – calculations, going over theories to go to sleep, suppressing his instincts, fighting with himself. But when he was given the drugs, that would all float away and he felt nothing. He could go to a small place in his mind where everything was okay, and he did not have to think. It was bliss.

So, when the team stormed the house he had been confined in, the first concern in his mind was losing that. He should have been happy to be away from the abuse, to be able to eat and drink, and join the life he enjoyed so much. But he just wanted to feel nothing. So, while Tobias laid dead on the ground, multiple shot wounds in his chest, he snuck over and stole vials from his pocket.

He was weak, malnourished and unable to stand on his feet. The cool air of the woods surrounded him and rustled his shaggy hair from his spot kneeling on the ground by Tobias’s body. Tobias had been his friend. His dad was his abuser.

Spencer vaguely felt arms around him, lifting him up. He vaguely felt himself being laid on a stretcher and wheeled into an ambulance. Why did he need an ambulance? He felt okay. He did not feel anything. The world was fuzzy around the edges. The touches on his skin were like ghosts, the lights blinding him were easily ignored, and the voices around him faded into the background. It was like he was dreaming. He let the blackness surround him and he drifted off into the wind.

-

There was a 911 call in Philadelphia. A sighting of a man that mildly matched the description of Tobias Hankel. The BAU were immediately notified and they got on the plane. 7 months. 7 months of nothing. After the livestream fiasco where Spencer was killed and then revived in front of them, there was radio silence. It seemed like both Tobias and Spencer had disappeared into thin air.

The entire team mourned the young genius as if he had died, which they all knew that statistically speaking, that was the most probable. But Derek refused to give up. He went along with the team, taking down killers, listening to his music on the jet, but he did not really have his head in it. He went back to his apartment, which, to his credit, looked like a serial killer’s den. Pictures were taped up everywhere, maps and articles and post-it notes. He knew that there was something they were missing. He knew that Reid was still alive.

Call it an alpha’s intuition, but he just had a feeling. He always felt connected to the young genius. Whether that be because he was an alpha and Reid was the only omega in the entire FBI and Derek felt the need to protect him, or because Reid was so young and could so easily be manipulated.

Derek always felt personally responsible for the kid, so when Hotch got the call, it felt too good to be true.

He paced up and down the aisle the entire flight, unable to stay still. His irritability, his alpha instincts, made him snap at everyone who got too close or said something that doubted Spencer’s livelihood. He felt hot all over, the anxiety manifesting itself in a restless type of determination that made him pace quickly. When he felt like this, he’d normally go boxing, but that wasn’t a possibility right now.

They had raced to the place where Tobias had been spotted last – a ratty little shack in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania. Derek had immediately busted down the doors, police and other FBI agents flooding into the house behind him.

“Clear!” Emily called from the living room. Rossi gave an identical yell from the dining room and kitchen. Derek checked all the small rooms off the hallway, eyebrows shooting up when he saw one of the doors lead to a set of stairs. There were crashes from downstairs and cursing.

Derek ran down the stairs as fast as he could, eyes sweeping over the barren space. The floor was dirt, cement pillars holding up the ceiling. A singular chair sat in the center. Some spots on the cement walls were stained with blood. The room smelled filthy – a mixture of dirt, blood, and terrified omega. Derek's alpha growled at the scent of an omega in pain, his need to defend and protect taking over. Derek barely caught a glimpse of someone disappearing up a ladder on the other side of the basement. He cursed before running after the man. “Stop! FBI!” He called, climbing the ladder as fast as he could.

A man was limping away as fast as he could. He was trying to support a lankier, skinny body that was not doing him any favors. Derek immediately recognized that as Spencer. “Tobias Hankel! Stop! FBI!” He bellowed, deciding to drop his gun in favor of running at the man. The duo was moving significantly slower than he could, and he didn’t want to risk hurting the omega.

He tackled Tobias, shoving him to the ground and landing a swift punch to his jaw in order to subdue him. Spencer crumbled to the ground next to them with a weak whimper, too weak to stand on his own.

“You fucking scumbag!” Derek growled, feeling an anger in his veins. He pictured the blood on the walls – Spencer’s blood on the walls. He smelled how scared Spencer must have been the entire time. He saw how weak, how small, how malnourished the omega was. He punched and kicked, grappling with the man until he felt a blinding pain on his temple that knocked him sideways.

Tobias flipped them over, his gun pointing at Derek’s forehead. “Give me one reason why-“ the sound of three gunshots cut him off and he gasp ed, falling down face first into Derek's chest. Derek gasped in relief, shoving the man off of him. Hotch ran over, checking his pulse. Derek caught his breath, standing up and breathing heavily. 

Hotch glanced up at him and, with a shake of his head, Morgan knew Tobias was dead. And he didn't give a damn.

Spencer had found with way to Tobias's side, kneeling weakly. He looked like he was about to pass out, face pale and sickly thin. His normally prominent cheekbones were so sharp they looked like they could cut. He was always skinny - most omegas were - but he was sick now. 

"Oh, pretty boy, come on," he mumbled, picking Spencer up as delicately as he could. He didn't know how hurt the boy was. His clothes were filthy, but he was wearing something, so that was a good sign. He weighed almost nothing, his long body draping lifelessly across Derek's arms. He made small whimpering noises and Derek's alpha growled at the sound of an omega in pain, wanting nothing more than to take it away. 

Spencer unconsciously tucked his face in Derek's neck, scenting him to calm down. Spencer didn't normally smell strongly, and because so, Derek never put a scent to it - but he could clearly smell him now. Lavender, old books, and coffee. Derek preened, murmuring comforting words he wasn't sure Spencer heard of not as he carried him to the ambulance.

He laid the fragile body on a stretcher, his alpha whining when he was taken away. "Please, I need to go with him," Derek said stubbornly, trying to climb into the back of the ambulance while the EMTs set Spencer up with an IV. 

He was stopped by another EMT, an alpha, and he growled. "Is he your mate?" The alpha asked.

Derek growled. " No, fuck, but he's my best friend and he needs me. I'm familiar, I'm an alpha! " he was begging for Spencer's comfort as much as his own. He didn't know what hed do if Spencer was taken out of his sight. 

"We need to go! His BPs dropping!" The EMT by Spencer's head exclaimed . 

"What?" Derek snapped, heartbeat skyrocketing.

"Get in!" The second EMT growled. Derek climbed into the back of the ambulance right as they closed the door and drive off.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ive gotten so much positive feedback from this fic thank yall so much <3

Reid looked so small in the hospital bed. Sure, he was tall and lanky, the same height as Derek’s towering 6’1”. He was over 6” taller than most omegas, but Derek could tell he weighed less than any omega he’s ever seen.

“Sir?” A nurse called out, breaking Derek from his thoughts. He glanced up at her – she was a small, brunette omega wearing pink scrubs. But pink scrubs were only for the night shift nurses. With a glance out the window, Derek confirmed that it was indeed nighttime. “Visiting hours are over,” she said softly, avoiding his gaze. It was common for omegas to show submission to alphas, but something that Derek liked about Reid was that he always made eye-contact.

“Can’t I stay a little longer?” Derek pushed, glancing at Spencer’s seemingly lifeless form. “I need to be here when he wakes up.”

“Are you his mate?” The nurse asked, glancing down at the clipboard that she held.

Derek shook his head. “Well, no, but – “

“Then you can’t stay unless he specifically asks for you, and he can’t do that right now, sir,” she said, moving in to change Spencer’s medication in his I.V.

Derek felt a growl threaten to leave his lips. He raised his voice the slightest bit, unconsciously slipping in his alpha tone. “Well then can we wait until he wakes up-“

A small whimper interrupted what could have been a tirade. Both of the other people in the room’s eyes shot to the bed, where Spencer was trying to curl up in the smallest ball he possibly could. The omega placed his hands over his ears, tugging on his I.V. “I’m sorry,” he whined, tears in his eyes. He tilted his neck at Derek, completely submitting to him.

Derek’s eyes widened in shock – he had never seen Spencer even remotely give in to any animalistic urges. Submitting was something he never even thought that the proud Dr. Reid was capable of. “No, no, Pretty Boy,” he tried to use his gentlest voice, inching closer to the distressed mega. Pheromones of a scared omega filled the room, lavender coffee tinted with rancid espresso. It softened something in the alpha and all he wanted to do was help. “It’s okay – I’m not mad at you.”

“Upset alpha,” Spencer whimpered, trying to cover his face. “Don’t hit me, don’t – I can’t – “

“No, no,” Derek gasped. “I won’t hurt you, I promise. You know me.” He reached out for Spencer, resting his palm on Spencer’s bony back.

Spencer immediately screamed like he was in the worst pain imaginable, jerking away from his touch. “Don’t touch me! No!” He shrieked, scrambling away from Derek until he was falling over the side of the bed, his I.V. and other machines tearing from his skin. The nurse pressed a red button and a flood of nurses came in, trying to calm the frightened omega. He just screamed, sobbing loudly when anyone came close to him. He scrambled into a small spot under the bed by the wall, wedging himself in a small circle.

Derek watched the man in horror as multiple nurses tried different tactics to get him out of his hiding spot. They tried coaxing him out with the promise of sweets, they tried dragging him out by his feet, they tried everything. A nurse ushered Derek out of the room, and he was in too much shock to resist this time. As he was leaving, he was able to catch a glimpse of a nurse crawling into the space with a syringe to sedate the feral omega with. Spencer’s screams of agony tapered off until he was unconscious, and they were able to drag him out from under the bed.

This man was not his friend, he wasn’t the Spencer Reid that Derek knew. He was frightened, in full attack mode, his animalistic urges completely having taken over. Something terrible had happened to his Dr. Spencer Reid and Derek was going to find out what.

-

Bright and early the next day, Garcia and JJ were rushing out of the office. Derek glanced up at the, raising his eyebrows. With the speed and urgency that they were moving, something must be wrong. He jogged after them, abandoning his reports completely. “What’s going on? Did something happen?” he asked. He slipped into the elevator with them.

Garcia shrugged. “Oh, we don’t know, sugar. Got a call from the hospital. Apparently our Reid’s been giving them trouble.”

“Yeah, they said he’s a flight risk. Refuses to come out from under the bed and they’ve already used the legal amount of sedatives for 24 hours on him. The nurses think that maybe a familiar presence would help,” JJ explained thoroughly.

Derek shook his head, following them out of the elevator and to where JJ’s car was parked. “That won’t work. I was there last night when he first went berserk. It kind of got spurred on when I touched him,” he said. JJ and Garcia shared a look but didn’t comment; JJ just started driving. Derek frowned, glancing between them. “What?” He echoed.

Garcia sighed. “Listen, hot chocolate, I know you and Reid are friends, but at this point, he might just view you as a scary, big, mean alpha. Tobias was an alpha, no? And while I may be a beta and not understand the whole alpha/omega thing, I know its instinctual. And while I love you and I would be content snuggling into your chiseled arms every night, Reid might relate you to being back there.”

“Oh,” Derek slumped back against the seat. He did not think of that, but it did make sense. He looked out the window, feeling more useless than he ever did. “I just wanna help him,” he confessed.

“We know, honeybear, but maybe taking a step back for the time being will help him,” Garcia said, sighing. Derek threaded his eyebrows. How was he supposed to keep the instincts that scream at him to protect Reid away? “I can see those gears turning in that gorgeous head, baby, talk me through it.”

Derek frowned. “I just…I have to take care of him. You won’t understand. It’s an alpha/omega thing.”

Garcia scoffed. “Is it an alpha/omega thing or a Derek/Spencer thing?”

“What do you mean?” Derek echoed, leaning forward.

Garcia smirked her pink lips, turning around in her seat to look at him. “Have you felt this way about any other omega?”

Derek filtered through all the omegas he had ever been around in his brain. “Well…” the answer was no. He had never felt the pulling attraction, the need to protect, the raw alphan emotions, with anyone other than Reid. “He’s the omega I’m closest too,” he settled on.

Garcia hummed in disbelief, sitting forward again. “All I’m saying is I think there’s something there,” she said snidely.

“Yeah, well, it doesn’t mean anything, babygirl. It’s an alpha thing. Like you said earlier: you wouldn’t understand,” he nearly growled out. He almost immediately felt horrible, realizing he had snapped at his best friend. “Sorry, I just,” he sighed, running his hands down his face. “I feel so…”

“Helpless?” JJ supplied, to which Derek nodded his agreement.

“Yeah.”

“I think we all do.”

When the trio arrived to the wing of the hospital that Reid was in, Derek noticed for the first time that it was an all omega floor – no alpha patients allowed. The next thing he noticed was how quiet it was (almost eerily so) and how dark the lights were set, like they were trying to pretend it was a later time of day. An omega nurse skirted up to them. “Are you JJ and Penelope?” she asked softly. When the two girls nodded, she eyed Derek.

“I’m –“

“Derek Morgan, I know. I’ve heard a lot about you,” the nurse cut him off. Derek liked her immediately.

She lead them along the hallway, chittering away. She made sure to keep her voice down. “We have tried to station a nurse all the time by Dr. Reid’s door, but every time we turn our backs, he’s gone. He’s hidden under the tables, in supply closets, but it seems like his favorite place is under the bed. It’s a tight squeeze, so I don’t know how comfortable it can be. It’s a common reaction for omegas who have been through a traumatic experience – they want to feel small and comforted, like in a nest. Maybe if you brought a few things from his house, some blankets and shirts, it might calm him. He also probably wants to feel in control, so he moves around and he likes knowing that he can still control that element of his body.”

JJ nodded along to what she said. “Has he talked at all?”

“Very minimally,” the nurse sighed. “If he is talking, he’s yelling at us to get away when we try to give him his medicine. That’s another common reaction – being touched probably triggers his PTSD and his omega associates touch with pain.” She paused. “When we ask him questions, he normally doesn’t respond, but he has bitten a few nurses when they try to force feed him. It’s a fairly normal reaction considering what he’s gone through, but I thought that having someone here that knows him and has a comforting smell might calm him and maybe coax him back into bed. He’s been hiding under the bed for hours now, since we brought him breakfast. We’ve given him all the sedatives we can. And we need to get him back on his I.V., to keep him hydrated. And he’s made no effort to eat, and since he is so severely underweight, we might need to put in a feeding tube.”

The quartet found themselves standing in front of the glass of Reid’s room. Garcia and Morgan looked over, trying to look for the man while JJ listened to the nurse’s updates. Derek spotted Spencer almost immediately. The small omega was curled up under the bed, flush against the wall. He was watching all of them closely, but his eyes trained the most on Derek, sizing him up quietly. His knees were drawn to his chest, shaggy hair covering most of his face. He looked downright feral.

Derek tore his gaze away from the omega. “Is there anything I can do? Like, since I’m an alpha, and I scared him last time,” he asked the nurse, crossing his arms over his chest.

The nurse shrugged, sighing. “It’s really hit or miss. With the amount of trauma that he’s gone through, I’ve seen interactions with alphas go both ways. They could seriously regress the amount of security he has built up for himself, or they could aid it amazingly. I’ve seen trauma victims completely swear off alphas, but I’ve also seen alphas put them into EH in order to calm them.”

Derek glanced back at Reid, who was still staring at him with wide, owlish eyes. He seriously doubted the kid would let him put him into EH, no matter how bad he needed it. He probably hadn’t been put under since before the kidnapping, and who knows how long before that. The kid was nonstop working.

The trio headed into the room, walking slowly to not overwhelm the scared omega. JJ was the first to crouch down by the bed. “Hey, Spence,” she cooed softly, her tone mothering. Reid slowly dragged his eyes from Derek to JJ before back again anxiously. “Could you come out of there, hon? It looks cozy, but the nurses have to make sure you get better. You won’t get better down there.”

Reid blinked slowly, cat-like, at JJ, like he was actually considering it. He stayed quiet though, if anything, he pushed himself back into the hole.

“Is there anything we can do, Spence? We brought you some books, even some case files,” JJ tried again, digging through her bag. Spencer whimpered, curling up tighter. “No, no, I’m not going to hurt you,” JJ murmured, slowly taking out a thick case file. “Just thought you might want to get back in the groove of things.” She slid the file slowly towards Reid, but he made no attempt to pick it up.

He sniffled, eyes tearing up. Derek immediately went into protective alpha mode, and he gently pulled JJ away. “I think we’re overwhelming him, maybe just one of us should be in here at a time,” he suggested softly, keeping his voice low to not disturb the fragile omega.

“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” Garcia nodded, staring longingly at Reid. “JJ, you should probably stay. You’re the mom, and the least threatening. I get too passionate and Derek is scary.”

“Hey,” Derek glanced incredulously at her.

Garcia shrugged. “Sorry," she mouthed.

Their arguing was interrupted by a small, broken whimper. “Alpha; w-want Alpha,” Spencer whined from his small perch, tears streaming down his cheek. He was visibly shaking, his tiredness shown through the bags under his eyes.

JJ crouched down next to him to appear less threatening. “Spence, you’re not mated. You don’t have an alpha,” she told him softly, voice cooing.

“W-want Alpha, want…want…” Spencer’s bottom lip trembled and he sunk back in on himself, obviously done trying to communicate.

Derek quietly guided JJ away from the opening before crouching down himself, trying to appear as unthreatening as he possibly could with his muscles and frame. “Hey, pretty boy. Do you want me?” he asked as softly as he could, imaging how his sister used to coo to her cats. She found one in a nearby dumpster and gave him food and water every day for a month before the kitten finally let her touch him. That is how Derek must treat Spencer – like a scared kitten.

Spencer sniffled, wiping his cheeks with shaky hands. Up close he looked even worse, his skin more gray. His hair was in clumps and tangles, his curls winding together all the way down to brush his shoulders. He had a black eye that was healing, yellow around the edges. His lip had been busted and was still slightly swollen. Derek could vaguely see fingerprints on his throat. “Don’t…don’t feel good, Alpha,” he whimpered, low enough that no one else could hear.

Derek felt the strong urge to protect this broken boy and do whatever it takes. “Why don’t you come on out here, Pretty Boy? The doctors will make you feel better – they can’t take the pain away when you’re all cramped down here, huh? It’s probably uncomfortable too.”

Spencer hesitated but was obviously considering what Derek was saying. Derek ushered Garcia and JJ out of the room behind his back, knowing that if he got Reid out, the small omega might be spooked by too many people and hide again.

“C’mon, I’ll help you out,” Derek said warmly, reaching his hand out to help Spencer. Spencer left out a pitiful whimper, flinching away from the touch. Derek immediately retracted his hand. “Okay, here, I won’t touch you. What can I do?” He held up both his hands to show Spencer that he wasn’t touching him.

Spencer whined, this time a frustrated sound. More tears flooded down his cheeks. “Alpha,” he whined, placing one of his shaking hands over his scentmarker.

“Oh,” Derek raised his eyebrows. “My scent? You want my scent?” At Reid’s small, jerky nod, he grinned. This was a victory. “Here, how about I lean towards you, I won’t touch you. I’ll get close enough that you can scent me, yeah? I won’t touch you and you don’t have to touch me.”

Spencer was silent, eyeing Derek as if battling with himself. Finally, he nodded, chewing his already red bottom lip.

Derek smiled. “Okay, I’ll lean in. Keep my hands behind my back, won’t touch you,” he swore. He laid down on his stomach on the tile, wiggling until his head and shoulders were in Spencer’s little hole.

The omega paused for a long while, just staring at how close the Alpha was. But he smelled so good, like cigars and cookies and home. The scent made Reid’s head go fuzzy and his chest go warm. He felt drawn to it and soon enough he had uncurled himself from his tight ball. He leaned forward; his nose close enough to feel the warmth of Derek’s skin. But they weren’t touching.

He scented him hesitantly, breathing in his scent. He immediately felt at home, he felt comforted and safe and happy. He was transported to another place, a place that wasn’t underneath a hospital bed after he had been kidnapped and tortured for 9 months.

Spencer was so far gone; he didn’t notice Derek wiggling back little by little with Spencer following. Soon enough, they were both out in the open and Spencer was on the edge of EH. He probably didn’t even know it, but his quiet distressed noises had turned to quiet happy omega noises, he was practically moaning. Derek started purring to calm him and Spencer was out of it, dropped so hard so suddenly.

Derek’s alpha preened that he had the ability to take a shaking, crying omega and turn him into a loved up, pliant omega. He very hesitantly placed his hands on Reid’s body, being sure to position them so Reid’s nose was always in his neck, scenting and smelling and feeling. He laid Spencer on the bed and had to reluctantly pull away.

He lingered, watching as Spencer came back to consciousness while the nurse hooked him up to machines. The omega in EH almost seemed like he was on drugs, blinking slowly and glancing around. Derek watched on proudly, his alpha purring because he was able to do that. He could subdue a panicking omega.

“Please leave,” a small voice requested. Derek glanced down at Spencer, eyes lighting up.

“Hey, Babyboy, how are you-“

“I want you to leave,” Spencer said, voice more solid.

Derek paused in shock. “I-what?”

“Sir, you should leave,” the nurse insisted.

Spencer completely avoided eye contact, looking down at his own chest. “I didn’t want that. I w-want…want you to leave. You t-took advantage of me.”

“What? No, I didn’t. Spence, listen,” Derek tried, but he could tell he was talking to a brick wall.

“You need to get out right now, sir. Or I will have you removed,” the nurse threatened, this time starting to pull out her walkie-talkie.

“I’ll go, I’ll go, I’m…” he sighed, shaking his head as he watched Reid. The omega was just sitting there, no panic nor bliss on his face. It was more unnerving than any of Spencer’s other mood swings. “I’m sorry.”

Derek had nothing else to do but leave.


	3. Chapter 3

After a few days, Spencer was transported to a hospital in Virginia, only a ten-minute drive from his apartment. Derek did not visit his room again, but he always stayed up to date. He went to work and asked Garcia and JJ about the kid, both of whom visited him regularly. He always got the same update – nothing had changed. Spencer was a flight-risk, constantly hiding until the nurses finally strapped him to the bed, which sent him into a panic. He was given a feeding tube and had gained weight. He apparently looked better. Garcia had brought lots of sweaters from Reid’s apartment, even slipped in one of Derek’s which she did not mention to either the omega or alpha.

A few days after arriving in Virginia, Spencer was released. He was prescribed an anti-anxiety medicine, pain pills, a sleeping aid and lots of instruction to take it easy. Spencer did not do “easy”. He stayed up for 50+ hours playing chess, read books until his eyes hurt and then read some more. He'd run statistics over and over in his head until he fell asleep.

But now he had different things keeping him up at night. The downside of having an eidetic memory – he could remember everything that Tobias ever did to him. He can remember dying, his breath slowing and brain stopping, and then being revived, gasping to get air in his lungs. Tobias’s dad liked finding different ways to kill him, but his favorites were drowning and choking.

JJ drives Spencer back to his apartment. He stares out the window the entire time, taking in the familiar sights. He did not think he would ever see any of this again. They take the elevator up to his floor – something that Reid normally doesn’t do. He likes to take the stairs because they give him time to think. But even though he wasn’t under-weight anymore, he was still incredibly weak.

“Is there anything I can do for you, Spence?” JJ asked kindly while Spencer looked around his apartment. ‘Great Expectations’ by Charles Dickens was still open by the couch. A cup of coffee was sitting next to it, untouched. Spencer wrapped his arms around his waist, glancing around. Everything was exactly the way he left it. It smelled exactly the same – like coffee and books and lavender.

Spencer glanced over at JJ, chewing his bottom lip. He felt a strong urge in his gut to hide, feeling too out in the open just standing there. Anything could happen. “I want to be alone,” he murmured, voice raw from misuse. He glanced down at the floor.

JJ sighed. “You should probably eat something, Spence. The nutritionist put you on a strict diet. And there’s no way that I’m leaving you alone, the doctor recommended that something be with you at all times.”

Spencer looked down, He shrunk, whimpering softly. God, he hated himself. He was acting like an omega, something that he’s denied being since he presented. He pushed it down and ignored it and hated it. But now, for some reason, every instinct that he’s ever denied, all the omega stereotypes, were coming to the surface. He hated it, but he found that he didn’t have the brain capacity to fight it anymore.

“I’m tired,” Spencer said softly, feeling his eyes sting. No, he didn’t want to cry again. There was nothing to cry about.

JJ seemed to sense his quiet distress and frowned. “Okay, okay. How about you lay down in your bedroom? I can stay out here, but I’ll check on you, okay?” she bargained.

Spencer really did just want her to leave, but he knew that this was the best he was going to get. He nodded and quietly made his way down the hallway to his bedroom.

As soon as the door was closed behind him, Spencer took in everything. His closet door was open, leaving his clothes exposed, color coordinated. He had a wall of books – Derek and Hotch had helped him make a bookcase that covered the entire wall. It was packed full and he had more books on tables. Post-it notes littered the entire room, various reminders.

Spencer felt a pull to his bed – it was still messy. He just wanted to bury himself in his blankets and sleep for ages. He wrapped himself in the big cardigan that JJ had brought him – it was his sick cardigan. He always wore it when he felt like shit, when he was sick, or a case went bad. It was huge on him, fuzzy and soft, it went down to his knees.

He curled up in bed and covered himself with the blankets. He tucked his knees into his chest, trying to get as small as possible. He ducked his head under the blankets and pressed himself into the mattress, trying to get as small as possible. He wanted the mattress to swallow him whole – he wanted to disappear. Everything would be so much easier. He wouldn’t have to feel emotions, feel the hurt, feel the need.

The need to hide. The need to be comforted. He felt too exposed in the bed, restless and scared. He kicked out his legs and found himself getting up and travelling to his closet. He took some clothes off the hangers and laid them on the floor. He grabbed his blankets and pillows and dragged them to join the clothes. He arranged everything in a circle, making quick work like his hands knew what to do while his mind hadn’t caught up yet.

Spencer caught the scent of something different. Like cigars and warm cookies. He searched for the scent, finally finding it attached to a piece of fabric under his bed. It was a soft gray Northwestern football t-shirt. Derek’s. It smelled just like him. Spencer buried his face in the soft fabric, scenting it. It smelled like home. He has no idea why the t-shirt was under his bed, maybe he accidentally grabbed it during one of the many times he and Derek shared a hotel room.

He found himself taking his cardigan and the shirt he was wearing off and slipping on the t-shirt. He practically swam in it, the fabric brushing his thighs. He purred softly and wrapped the cardigan around himself again. The mingling of their scents was gorgeous and made his blood sing. Lavender cookies and books and cigars. Home.

Spencer curled up in his nest, closing the closet door behind him. He let his instincts take over, turning around a few times before settling down and pulling his comforter over his body. He buried his face in Derek’s t-shirt and finally drifted off into a restful sleep.

\--

Derek was sitting at his desk when his personal cell rang. He had been working non-stop since they all arrived back at Quantico, trying to distract himself from the one thing he couldn’t stop thinking about – Spencer. The small omega had been so scared before Derek put him down. And the vacant look in his eyes, the complete betrayal he felt after he realized what Derek had done, it made Derek’s alpha whine and cry. He just wanted to help.

“Morgan,” he answered his phone curtly, flipping the page of a report.

“Fuck, Derek, I lost him. I-I don’t know where he is. He was here and I shouldn’t have let him close the door and –” JJ rambled, her voice raising in panic. There was shuffling in the background, apparently from her searching.

Derek blinked in surprise and cut her off. “What? What are you talking about, JJ?”

“Spencer!” JJ cried out. “He’s gone. He just disappeared.”

“What?” Derek growled, grabbing his coat and immediately leaving the office. “You left him _alone_?” He raised his voice, his pitch deepening as his alpha voice slipped through.

“I-I…yeah, he seemed tired. He just – he wanted to lay down – and fuck, he’s gone, Derek. Fuck,” JJ was obviously crying at this point.

“You had one job, _goddamit!”_ Derek growled. “Keep him safe! Don’t keep your eyes off of him. You knew he was a flight risk, Jennifer!”

JJ whimpered. “I thought I’d call you. You can smell him and maybe find a trail for where he went off to. Fuck, oh my god,” she sighed.

“I’ll be right there,” Derek growled. He hung up with a groan as he climbed into his car. “Fuck, fuck,” he chanted under his breath as he sped to Spencer’s apartment.

His heart raced in his chest, head thumping. The feeling was not unsimilar to the feeling he gets when he’s in the heat of a pursuit. When he has his gun pulled, his eyes trained on the unsub, waiting for him to do something to get him killed. But this feeling was 100% more intense because it was primal, a primal need to protect and save. His omega was gone, possibly in danger. Fuck, what if Tobias found him again. No, Tobias was dead. But someone else? Wait, no, Reid wasn’t his omega. He was just an omega. But Derek wanted him to be his omega. Fuck.

Derek pulled up to Spencer’s apartment building and ran inside, taking the stairs two at a time. He pounds on the door of Reid’s apartment until JJ answers. Her hair was mussed from running her hands through it, tears in her eyes.

“I’m so sorry, I-“

Derek growled, pushing passed her and into the apartment. It looked exactly the same as when Derek and the team had looked through it in order to try to find any clues about who had taken Spencer. They found nothing.

“Where did you last see him?” Derek growled, his animalistic instincts taking over. He scanned the area, scenting the air. Reid’s scent was fresh, so he was definitely there earlier.

JJ covered her face with her hands. “He went to his room. I was bringing him dinner and he was gone.”

Derek stalked to Spencer’s bedroom. The scent intensified the closer the got to the room. The bed was stripped clean, but everything else seemed to be in its place. Derek scented, and the intensity of the smell pointed to Reid still being in the room.

He walked in circles around the room, smelling the air. The scent of lavender and coffee got stronger the closer he got to the closet. Derek hesitantly opened the door and was hit with a fresh wave of the smell. “Pretty boy?” he asked softly, which was wonder considering how shaky his hands were.

A small whimper came from the floor. Derek crouched down, pushing a few of the clothing items out of the way. There, in the back of the closet, was Reid hidden partially by a nest. He was poking his head out of the mess of clothes and blankets, his eyes wide. He blinked slowly, like a cat.

Derek sighed in relief, hanging his head. “Oh, pretty boy. You had us so scared,” he breathed out.

Spencer nibbled at his bottom lip. “S-sorry, Alpha,” he whimpered. “Just…wanted safe.” He curled up tighter in his nest.

Derek felt his heart warm. “That’s okay, baby, no, don’t apologize. It’s okay. I’ll go tell JJ that you’re okay, yeah?”

Spencer nodded shakily, biting his bottom lip. “Can…come back?” he asked softly.

Derek fondly smiled, reaching out to run his fingers through Spencer’s shaggy hair. The omega practically purred. “I’ll be right back, Babyboy. Count to 60, yeah? And I’ll be back by then.”

Spencer smiled softly, seemingly content to have something to do. It was intellectual, but not too hard for his brain to comprehend. He started counting softly, burying his nose in the t-shirt he was wearing. Derek recognized it as his old college football shirt, the one he thought he lost years ago. He smiled fondly, chest warming at the sight of his omega being warm and soft and cuddly in his clothes.

He stood up and went to the kitchen, where JJ was still shaking. “I found him – he made a nest in the closet,” he told the woman, who let out a small sob at the news. “He’s okay, hey, hey,” Derek pulled her to his chest in a hug. “I’m sorry I was so harsh with you. Just-“

“I know,” JJ sniffled, wiping her eyes. “It’s okay.”

Derek sighed, closing his eyes. Spencer was okay, he knew that. His heartbeat started to slow while he reminded himself that his omega was okay. Not his. But his.

“I have to get back there with him,” Derek pulled away.

“Okay, can you bring him dinner? Maybe you’ll get him to eat,” JJ suggested, handing Derek a bowl of tomato soup.

Derek nodded and went back to the bedroom. Spencer was still curled up, whispering quietly to himself. “46…47…”

“Hey, Pretty Boy, I brought you some dinner,” Derek rumbled, sitting down cross-legged in front of Spencer. The small omega quietly eyed Derek, nibbling his bottom lip. “Can you eat some for me?” He pushed the bowl a little closer to Spencer’s nest. When the boy made no attempt to touch it, he sighed. “You gotta eat, baby. How about I feed you?”

Spencer eyed him, but eventually, he nodded his head. Derek moved a little closer to him. “Can I come into your nest, baby?” Spencer watched him for a very long time, the wheels turning in his head. He nodded slowly and moved over, adjusting some of the blankets to make room for Derek’s body.

Derek grinned victoriously and gently moved into the warm nest. The blankets smelled like Reid, but the mix of Derek’s t-shirt turned the scent smoky and delicious. Derek laid down, leaning against the wall and pulling his knees to his chest to fit comfortably in the nest. He pulled the comforter over both of them. Spencer hesitated before shifting, leaning his head against Morgan’s shoulder. Derek smiled – contact was apparently okay, as long as Reid initiated it.

Derek smiled fondly, feeding him spoons full of soup until half of the bowl was gone and Spencer quietly refused to eat anymore. Spencer was boneless, completely relaxed against Derek’s chest. He tilted his head up, nuzzling his nose into Derek’s neck. Derek wrapped his arm around the small boy’s shoulders, letting him cuddle close.

Small purrs rumbled in both their throats, their happy pheromones mingling together and drifting off in the wind.


	4. Chapter 4

Spencer woke of acutely aware that he was cuddled into a warm body. With a start he realized that warm body was Derek. Everything came back to him - the battle in his brain about whether to let Derek into his safe place (for he was an alpha And alphas were scary). But it was Derek - Derek was sweet. He was fierce and tall and so soft with Spencer despite his size and temperament (which damn near didn't exist at all).

After a traumatic experience, nearly 80% of omegas imprint on the closest alpha they could find. Like the Nightingale effect, the syndrome that patients get when a doctor saves their life. That's all Spencer allowed himself to acknowledge Derek as, just as alpha who helped him by indulging his instincts. No matter how much Spencer wanted to spend the rest of his life curled up in Derek's arms like they were right now, mated to the strong man. Spencer bets that Derek would protect their pups with the same fierceness he displays in the field and a shiver runs up his spine. No, don't think about that. Derek doesn't want him, he just feels bad because Spencer was an omega who went through a traumatic experience. Derek probably blames himself and he wants to make sure Spencer's okay. He doesn't want to be Spencer's mate. Spencer is a practically broken omega.

Then theres the issue of his heat. Spencer had been through a few when he was younger, which was agony when he was alone. As soon as he was old enough, he started taking suppressants. Obviously, when he was in Tobias's hold, he couldn't take the suppressants, but the stress on his body and the fear held all his heat cycles at bay. Now that he was out, it was inevitable that he was going to go into heat. And probably soon. Did Spencer want Derek there? Derek would never hurt him, but what if Derek felt obligated to say yes? He shouldn't, but Spencer didn't know the Alphas mind.

Also 82% of heats between an unbonded omega and alpha lead to mating, which leads to pregnancy. And if the mating was heat of the moment (no pun intended), then it would lead to a bond-break. Breaking the bond was hell for both the alpha and omega. Spencer wasn't sure he'd survive something like that. Especially if he was in love with Derek and the alpha rejected him.

Of course Derek would reject him. He was gorgeous, strong, confident, the perfect alpha. Omegas threw themselves at him. Spencer was broken. He was anxious and scared and shied away from touches. He wasn't worthy of a perfect, idyllic alpha.

A small whimper left his lips. "What's wrong, pretty boy?" Derek asked softly, and - oh, Derek was awake. Of course he was, he probably couldn't sleep while dealing with Spencer's pathetic episodes.

Spencer frowned to himself, pulling away from the alpha’s warm chest. “Wanna be alone,” he murmured, curling up in a ball. He covered himself with the comforter.

Derek hesitated. “A-are you sure?” _No._ “Did I do something wrong?”

“No,” Spencer whispered. “Just wanna be alone.”

After a few moments of silence, Derek sighed. “Okay. I’ll stay in the living room in case you need me,” he said softly. His bulk was gone soon, shifting out of Spencer’s nest. Spencer sniffled, hiding his face in order to hide his tears. _Don’t go…_

He tried to get comfortable, turning around over and over again until he was just frustrated. Eventually, he snorted, too frustrated and exhausted to fight his instincts. He buried his face in the pillow that Derek had been laying on and was immediately sated, going boneless. He moaned softly, scenting the pillow until he fell into a deep sleep.

\--

Derek sighed, leaving Reid’s room. He closed the door, but left it open a crack in case he had to get to Spencer quick. JJ was sitting at the dining room table, on her laptop. She yawned, running her fingers over her ponytail.

“Hey, why don’t you head home? I told Reid I wasn’t leaving, so I can watch him until you feel good enough. Go home to your boys,” Derek told her, sitting on the couch and grabbing his phone. It was late – 11:48 PM.

JJ nodded, biting her bottom lip. “I’m really sorry for freaking you out earlier,” she said softly as she packed up her stuff.

Derek shook his head. “No, thank you for calling me. I needed to know and…” he paused. “It made me feel useful.”

“I understand,” she said, giving him a short one-armed hug before leaving.

Derek wandered around for a little while, deciding to make himself at home. He found a can of soup in the cabinet and let that heat up on the stove. The TV had a film of dust over it, and it was old as shit, just a box, but when Derek pressed a few buttons, it whirred on. He settled on the news and turned it on low as to not disturb Spencer. He was probably asleep again.

He ate the soup quietly, flipping between watching the television and looking through the files JJ had left him. He sighed, growing more tired as time went on. He rinsed out the bowl he used and settled on the couch.

After no more than an hour, he was dozing between consciousness and being asleep. He heard some shuffling and dragging, like a blanket on the floor. A small boy sat next to him and he felt the omega curl up in his side. Derek pretended to be asleep, thinking that maybe if he acknowledged Spencer’s cuddling, that might draw the small boy to leave. And Derek really didn’t want that.

He never wanted Spencer to leave, or feel bad, or hate him. He would do everything in his power to fight for the boy, his boy. He would protect him from anything. And now that he knew what it was like to be without Spencer, he never wanted to feel that feeling again.

The omega’s sweet smell surrounded Derek and soon they were both fast asleep.

\--

Derek woke up to a sweet smell, like lavender and espresso and vanilla. He felt pressure on his side, like someone was pushing against him. Small whimpers filtered into his brain and he finally processed that Spencer wanted something.

“Hey, baby,” Derek greeted sleepily, voice raw. He rubbed his eyes sleepily and was met with a squirming Reid by his side, in tears. Panic mode immediately hit. “Oh, no, baby, what-“

“H-hurts,” Spencer whined, desperately burying his face in Derek’s side. “Don’t feel good, Alpha.”

Derek ran his hand over Spencer’s hair. He was choking on how intense the scent was, so sweet and, oddly, arousing. But thinking about sex was not a good idea while Spencer was this upset. “I can get your pain meds? What’s wrong, pretty boy?”

“H-hot,” Spencer whimpered, writhing. He was stripped from his big cardigan but was now tugging on the collar of Derek’s shirt that he was wearing. His skin was glistening with sweat.

Derek nodded his agreement – it was unusually hot in the apartment. But it wasn’t “I’m going to sweat through my T-shirt” hot. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” Derek soothed him. “I’ll turn down the temperature and get your pain medicine.”

He started to get up, only to be dragged back down on the couch by Spencer. “No, Alpha, No, don’t leave me,” he whined, his voice banking on feral.

“I have to get your medicine, baby,” Derek sighed, trying to unstick himself from the omega. His scent was making it hard to even think, the alpha’s thought becoming muddled and slow. Spencer smelled so good.

Spencer shook his head, panting. “Won’t help, don’t need…need,” he groaned, burying his face in Derek’s side. He shifted his hips, trying to climb onto Derek’s lap. Derek saw that the small omega’s sweatpants were soaked through, wet in between his thighs and on his ass. He gasped.

“Spence? Fuck, Spence. No, you’re in heat,” Derek tried to push the omega away, who whined like he was being wounded. Derek’s alpha howled. “No, I can’t. I have to leave. I’ll…I’ll call JJ.”

“No, no!” Spencer cried, in near hysterics. “Need you, Alpha. Please!”

“I-I can’t,” Derek growled. “I’m sorry – I want to. I can’t.” He unstuck himself from Spencer’s clinginess, which was hard because the omega suddenly became strong when he was in heat. Spencer cried out like he was being physically wounded and Derek’s alpha wanted nothing more than to scoop him up and protect him and help him through his heat. God, having Spencer writhing and desperate under him, begging for his knot. Begging to be mated.

Derek shook his head, grabbing his phone. He left the apartment, closing the door behind him. After a quick call to JJ, breathlessly explaining the situation. He sighed, leaning his head back against the door. He tried to ignore the desperate cries of his omega on the other side.


	5. Chapter 5

Walking away from that door was the hardest decision that Derek ever had to make. He didn’t visit Spencer for days, too afraid that if he smelled the lasting effects of heat, he’d jump the poor omegas bones. He just looked so delicious on the couch, squirming and begging for release. Derek could get drunk off his scent.

Which proved that Derek might have feelings for the omega. He thought about him constantly. He texted JJ repeatedly, only panicking a little bit when it took her more than 5 seconds to reply with how Spencer was doing. Derek eventually came to the conclusion that this behavior was, in fact, not normal alpha/omega behavior. It was the behavior of an alpha who had found a mate. Derek had all but imprinted on Spencer.

After a few days, JJ came back to work, and Garcia took some time off to omega-sit Spencer. He had apparently lost a few pounds during his heat and needed to be monitored. Derek’s phone was ringing within an hour of Penelope leaving. She explained that Spencer refused to eat and kept hiding, whining and crying about his alpha. As soon as Derek heard that, he raced to Spencer’s apartment.

When he got there, Spencer was no where to be seen. Penelope was nervously pacing around the kitchen, mumbling to herself. “Hey, hey, Mama, where’s the kid?” Derek asked, walking over.

Penelope shrugged, shaking her head. “I have no idea. He’s been in his closet a lot, b-but…you know me – I need support and I don’t handle stress well and he’s just a huge ball of stress and that stresses me out because you know how I feed off of other peoples energy and he keeps running and hiding and it just – it stresses-stresses me out. I’m so stressed out-“ she rambled, in near hysterics.

Derek shushed her quietly. “No, No, baby girl. Listen to me – this isn’t your fault. He just does this – it’s his omega nature. And I can smell him, he’s still in the apartment. Now, I want you to take deep breaths and stay right here. I will go get him and check on him. Then you can go back to work, get a caramel latte or whatever and chill.”

Penelope frowned, sighing. “You know you’re the only caramel latte I want,” she grumbled.

“There’s my girl,” Derek grinned, pecking her cheek. He followed Spencer’s scent to his bedroom, eyebrows raising in alarm when he saw the window wide open. He cursed and ran over, looking down. His heart was beating a mile a minute. The fire escape was right there, so there was no way Reid could’ve jumped. There was also no body on the ground. Derek climbed out onto the escape, cursing again when the smell wasn’t as potent outside from getting carried away by the wind.

Derek figured that the roof would be easier to patrol and check for signs of Reid. A controlled environment. He climbed the stairs two at a time until he reached the roof. It was windy, which caused a little chill to run up Derek’s spine.

“Reid?” Derek called out, searching the roof. He looked behind the staircase, the water heater, everywhere. No Spencer. He growled to himself and bolted back down the fire escape, all the way to the street. He glanced both ways, a frustrated noise leaving his lips. “Goddamnit-“

“Derek?”

Derek spun around, eyes widening when he saw Spencer standing there. He had a cup of coffee in his hand, his other hand holding a plastic CVS bag. He stood there like it was completely normal, his head tilted in confusion like he was wondering why Derek was so frantic. Like he wasn’t just wandering the streets after climbing through his window and escaping down a fire escape.

“Spencer, what the hell?” Derek breathed out, rushing over and wrapping the small omega in his arms.

“Watch the coffee, hey,” Spencer warned, holding the cup up high. He flinched at first, but overall let Derek touch him.

“Where the hell did you go?” Derek gasped, pulling away to get a good look at him. He looked the same, still bruised, but he was healing up quite nicely. He looked safe. “You had us worried sick.”

Spencer frowned, pulling out of Derek’s touch. “I just…” he sighed, growling in frustration. “I wanted to be an adult and do things that adults do without Garcia or JJ hovering over my shoulder and asking if I’m okay ever two seconds. I can take care of myself.”

Derek paused, blinking at the fierceness and exasperation in Spencer’s words. That was also the most Derek had ever heard him talk at the same time. “I get that, Pretty Boy, but you could’ve just told us and we would’ve let you go get coffee or whatever,” he motioned to the bag in Spencer’s hand. Spencer tilted his head, raising his eyebrows in disbelief. Derek sighed. “Fine, whatever. No, we wouldn’t have. For good reason too. You’re too weak and you’re sick and…and we can’t protect you when we don’t know where you are. Plus, you just got out of heat and your scent -shit- is so much stronger right now. Who knows who would’ve come up to you!”

“I’m not helpless, Derek,” Spencer whined. “I have my gun. I have pepper-spray. I took the same self-defense courses as you did!”

“And yet you still got abducted!” Derek all but screamed, his alpha voice at full force.

Spencer was rendered speechless, lips parted in shock. He teared up and slowly a few tears fell down his cheeks. “I…I’m sorry,” he whimpered, lips trembling.

“Hey, hey, no,” Derek cooed, eyes widening when he realized his mistake. “No, baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell.” He reached out, going to touch Spencer and cuddle him better, but Spencer flinched away with a whimper.

“I wanna go home,” Spencer whimpered under his breath. He suddenly looked so much smaller and weaker, so much more like an omega. He looked exhausted.

Derek frowned, at a complete loss of what to do. “Okay,” he murmured helplessly.. He walked with Spencer to the elevator and they rode up in complete silence. The tears had stopped, but Spencer was leaning on the opposite wall of Derek, trying to get as much space between them as possible. Garcia tried to embrace the omega as soon as they were through the door, to which Spencer skirted away from. He mumbled a half-assed excuse about being tired and locked himself in his room.

“Shit,” Derek groaned, running his hands over his scalp.

Garcia turned to him, eyes wide. “What happened, Der?” she asked softly.

“He worried us so bad, and then he just comes walking down the street like normal. Like, shit, he has no idea how dangerous that is!” Derek raised his voice slightly.

Garcia raised her eyebrows. “Whoa. Whoa. Chill. I’m pretty sure Spence knows exactly how dangerous it is. He knows better than any of us.”

Derek growled softly. “I guess so,” he grumbled.

\--

At nearly 1 AM, Derek was startled awake by clanking and cursing. Garcia had left hours ago, after they ordered a pizza and tried to feed Spencer. He wouldn’t open the door, claiming he wasn’t hungry. Derek was up immediately and running to Spencer’s room.

“Spencer?” Derek called out, knocking on the door. He tried the knob, which surprisingly opened the door. The door to the en-suite bathroom was wide open and Spencer was sitting on the floor. Caramel wrappers were littered all around the room, as well as sugar cookies. The sugar cookies weren’t eaten though, just opened. “Well, I guess I know why you weren’t hungry earlier.”

Spencer shot him a look of disdain and Derek’s lips quirked. This was his boy.

“What are you doing, Pretty Boy?” Derek asked softly. He knew he was on thin-ice with the boy and he didn’t want to make it worse.

After a few moments of hesitation, Spencer sighed and showed Derek the scissors he had in his hand. “Was um…trying to cut my hair,” he murmured. “But I can’t reach places.”

Derek frowned, leaning against the door-jam of the bathroom. “Is that what you bought at CVS?” he asked. At Spencer’s confused brow furrow, Derek scoffed. “We’re both profilers, Babyboy, we notice everything.”

Spencer sighed, wringing his hands. Derek took in the state of his hair, still shaggy but with uneven lengths. He still looked beautiful.

“I can help,” Derek offered.

Spencer let out a small giggle, his lips twitching into a smile. Derek grinned, his alpha purring at the fact that he made his omega laugh. He hadn’t heard that in a long time. “You don’t have any hair,” Spencer pointed out, his voice soft and teasing.

Derek shrugged. “Beggars can’t be choosers, kid. It’s either you walk around like that, or you let me have a crack at it.”

Spencer frowned, seeming to weigh his options. Eventually he sighed, handing Derek the metal scissors. Derek grinned victoriously. Spencer stood up, grabbing a caramel from the little pile on the sink. He sat on the toilet seat, blinking up owlishly at Derek.

Derek chuckled, moving closer to him. “What? You’re not gonna offer me some sugar?”

“I-what?” Spencer stuttered out, flustered. His cheeks tinted pink and he dipped his head. Derek laughed softly, glancing over at his little stash of candy. “O-oh! Yeah, sure. You can have some!”

After teasing the poor omega, Derek settled, grabbing the comb off of the sink. “Okay, kid, welcome to the salon de la Morgan,” he sing-songed, starting to brush out Reid’s bangs.

Reid cringed at the tangles and rolled his eyes. “I’m already regretting this.”

\--

Needless to say, Derek escorted Spencer to a proper barber the next day.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i just finished season 11 of CM and I wanna die 
> 
> (also sorry i didn't update yesterday -- my mom is in the hospital)

Derek stood in the kitchen, shirtless, quietly making toast with peanut butter and banana for Spencer. The omega had a doctors appointment in 20 minutes and still hadn’t eaten breakfast. Before bed last night, Derek had shed his shirt, but it was gone by morning. He was too lazy to look for it, so he figured he’d just grab one of the extra shirts he kept in the trunk of his car.

This had become the normal after a few weeks – Derek staying at Spencer’s apartment. He slept on the couch, made all of Spencer’s food, coaxed him out of his room and they’d watch movies together or Spencer would read while Derek worked. Spencer was going insane, going stir-crazy staying in the apartment. He would stomp around, throwing quiet temper tantrums, until Derek casually suggested that they should go out. Spencer would grin, say “that sounds like an amazing idea!” like he wasn’t completely baiting the alpha into it.

They would only go out for about an hour before Spencer got too tired, but it was enough to sate his frenzy. He would always stick close to Derek, knowing that no one would mess with him if they saw that he was with a muscular alpha. Derek preened whenever they went out, on full peacock mode. Spencer usually locked himself in his room afterwards, hating himself for craving an alpha’s protection; he’s strong and independent, dammit!

“Pretty Boy, c’mon. We gotta go if we wanna be on time. You can eat in the car,” Derek called out, grabbing a water bottle from the fridge.

When he closed the fridge door, Spencer was standing at the entrance to the kitchen, wringing his hands. “Oh,” Derek hummed. The small omega was practically swimming in pair of loose sweatpants and – oh, that’s the shirt Derek lost last night. It was another one of his Northwestern football shirts, but this one was a royal purple. He lost the gray one a while ago, and Spencer had been wearing it nonstop since he got out of the hospital. Derek’s alpha purred.

“Um…let’s go,” Derek finally stuttered out once he realized that he had been standing there for a while just staring at Spencer. The small omega was bright red and fiddling with his newly cut hair. It was short on the sides and longer and curly on the top. He looked so young. 25 is too young to have gone through what he’s gone through. That boy had lived a thousand lifetimes in his 25 years.

There were 6 years between them, but it seemed like ages when Reid was standing their – vulnerable and small.

They headed downstairs and Derek helped Reid into his car. Spencer grumbled the entire time about how he was independent and could get into a car by himself. Derek just rolled his eyes fondly and closed the door. He drove them to the hospital, one hand on the wheel and one hand in his lap.

“Did you know that two million drivers have had an accident, or near accident while driving with just one hand?” Spencer commented, staring out the window.

Derek rolled his eyes fondly. “You don’t say,” he murmured.

Spencer nodded, smiling a little bit to himself. Derek found himself smiling. His boy was coming back. He was still jumpy, he still flinched whenever someone went to touch him too quickly. He hated water and getting him to shower was the most difficult job Derek ever assigned himself. He sometimes dissociated, getting quiet and not responding for hours. He would squirrel up in his nest for hours at a time. Some nights, Derek would wake up from cries, or screaming from nightmares and have to talk him down. He wasn’t allowed to touch Spencer when he got like that – the boy went into full feral attack mode. He pulled a knife on Derek the first time before realizing what was happening. Other nights, Derek would wake up with Spencer curled up next to him or on top of him on the couch, needing physical touch. He always preferred when Derek was shirtless, so he could feel his heartbeat and his warmth.

Spencer also avoided alphas at all costs – he was even apprehensive with letting Hotch into his space. He would scent out stores and coffeehouses before they went inside to make sure no alphas were there. Omegas made him a little jumpy and he stayed closer to Derek. Derek didn’t know why he did this, but he assumed that maybe Spencer felt a little threatened by other omegas. He hopes that Spencer knows that no other omega will ever catch Derek’s eye.

They arrived at the hospital and Derek escorted him in. They sat in the waiting room for a while before being called back. Spencer assured the nurse that he wanted Derek there, blinking and stuttering through the explanation. Spencer watched the nurse closely during the entire exam, eyes wide and barely blinking. He flinched whenever she touched him, no matter how light the touch. By the time she was gone and they were waiting for the doctor to come in, Spencer was nearly in tears from how wound up he was.

“Hey, kid,” Derek murmured softly, walking over to him slowly.

Spencer whimpered, biting his bottom lip. “I’m trying to be good, I promise,” he whined.

“No, no, you’re doing so well. You’re being so brave,” Derek assured him. “This can’t be easy for you.” Spencer shook his head quickly, wiping his eyes. Derek sighed. “How about I go get you some water? I’ll be right back.”

Spencer eyed him, like he was searching for a lie. “Um…okay. Be quick?” he requested.

Derek nodded, smiling softly. “Yeah, I’ll be quick.” He headed out the door after a long look at Spencer’s shrinking form. He quickly looked around for a vending machine and eventually found one at the end of a long hallway. After retrieving the bottle of water, a siren sounded over the P.A., making him jump.

“Code orange, code orange,” a voice over the P.A. warned. The hallways erupted into panic, doors to rooms closing, nurses running around and checking every corner and under every table.

Derek glanced around and caught the wrist of a nurse who was rushing by. “Hey, what’s going on? I’m FBI; I could help,” he flashed her his badge.

She swallowed. “Code orange is a violent runaway patient,” she said briefly before disappearing down the hall.

“Fuck, Spencer,” Derek cursed and took off in a run towards the room that Spencer had his exam in. It was empty. “Fuck,” he banged his hand on the door-jam.

He rushed along the hallways, following the scent of his distressed omega. Derek should’ve been there; he never should’ve left Spencer alone. The boy hadn’t run and hid in a while, but Derek left him alone. Derek searched the entire floor before following the scent upstairs. He checked every room, heart thumping out of his chest. He didn’t call out Spencer’s name because then the boy would know people were after him and he’d hide even better.

The scent stopped right outside the door of a supply closet. Derek paused, pressing his ear to the door. He heard little whimpers and sighed in relief. “Baby?” he called out softly, knocking on the door lightly with his knuckles. The whimpering stopped. “Hey, I know you’re in there, Pretty Boy. Can you open up?” Nothing. Derek sighed and checked the doorknob, finding it unlocked. He opened it slowly, glancing around for the omega.

Spencer was curled up on the floor, hiding behind a collection of mops. His eyes were wide and scared, his entire body shaking. His knuckles were bloody and there were traces of blood under his nails. He looked downright feral.

“Babyboy,” Derek whispered, sitting down on the floor in the middle of the closet. “What happened?”

Spencer stayed silent, scenting the air. Eventually, he crawled out from behind the mops and slowly made his way over to Derek. He didn’t touch and was still curled up on himself, but he was out in the open. “I-I’m sorry,” he whimpered.

“It’s okay, baby,” Derek assured him. “Can you tell me what happened?”

Spencer didn’t speak for a long while. “I wanna go home,” he murmured.

Derek sighed. “Okay, we can do that,” he nodded, standing up. Spencer followed after him, still shaking. He wrapped his arms around his waist, hiding his hands under his arms. Derek told a nurse that he found the patient and the code was shut down. He lead Spencer out to the car and helped him inside, still not touching him.

Once they were halfway back to Spencer’s apartment, the omega started talking. “I didn’t know that my doctor was an alpha,” he whispered.

Derek glanced over at him, eyebrows raised. “Your doctor? He was an alpha?” he growled.

Spencer nodded. “He tried to touch me and I said no but he wouldn’t listen. He tried to strap me down so I punched him and scratched him and ran.”

Derek was quiet for a long time, soaking up the information. He tried to control his anger, but he could feel it bubbling under his skin. The hospital would be getting an earful later. There were millions of responses running around in his head, from yelling to punching the steering wheel to growling and pulling over to stake his claim. Eventually he settled on talking calmly. “I think you were completely justified.”

Derek could feel Spencer’s surprised look on the side of his face. “You should turn me in to the police for assault.”

“I should turn that doctor into the police for assault,” Derek all but growled. Spencer stayed quiet.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there,” Derek said, pulling into a parking along the road in front of Spencer’s building.

“I don’t blame you.”

“I know,” Derek nodded. He helped the boy out of the car and took the elevator up to his apartment. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Im so proud of this chapter -- she's a long-y and a big-y

Spencer returns to the BAU a few weeks later. He got dressed in his khakis, a purple button and sweater, and, even though they were a little bit big on him now, he almost looked like the old Spencer. Almost, except for his eyes. His eyes were always wide and checking around, anxious and hurt. Haunted.

Derek picked Spencer up and took him to work, glancing over at him ever-so-often. Spencer looked out the window the whole time quietly.

“Are you sure you’re ready to come back?” Derek asked for the hundredth time as they boarded the elevator in headquarters.

Spencer looked around the elevator, humming to himself. “Yep. Same answer I’ve given you every time you’ve asked me the past 17 times.”

“I have not asked you that 17 times,” Derek argued.

“I have an eidetic memory. You asked me if I was sure I’m ready to come back 17 times,” Spencer deadpanned. The elevator dinged and they walked out together.

Derek sighed, stepping in front of Spencer to make him stop. “Seriously. Boy Wonder, you gotta give me something here. I’m worried about you.”

“Why?” Spencer tilted his head.

Derek blanched. “Is that not obvious? I mean…the last time you were here, it was right before…” he trailed off.

Spencer raised his eyebrows. “Before I was kidnapped and tortured for 9 months?” he blinked. “Yes, I remember. I also know that right here is the safest place for me to be. There are 60 armed guards in the building, as well as a pretty impressive security system, secretaries, 5 stories and two walls that come in between me and the front door. Plus I’ll be in one big room with 6 trained FBI agents, me included. I am fine. I just want everything to go back to normal and I want to work.”

Derek paused. He guessed Spencer was right – this was the safest place for him physically. But mentally? Derek doesn’t know how he’ll handle it. He just has to trust him.

“Is that okay?” Spencer pressed, eyes wide.

Derek frowned, nodding. “Okay,” he whispered and got out of Spencer’s way. He followed the omega into their open room.

Everyone stopped what they were doing and ran over. JJ, Emily and Garcia cooed over him, asking him all types of questions and touching his hair. He flinched a little when they went to hug him, but he let them after a second. Rossi and Hotch hovered behind, nodding at Derek. Hotch knew that him getting close to Reid would cause unnecessary panic.

“It’s been so long!” Emily smiled at him.

“406 days since I’ve been here, actually,” Spencer hummed, nodding.

Emily smiled at him fondly. Her eyes said the same thing as Derek’s heart – they missed the kid.

“I told you that I didn’t want a big fuss,” Spencer scrunched his shoulder. He was smiling brightly. “But this is nice. Thank you all so much.”

“Yeah, definitely. We totally are not making a big fuss,” Garcia hummed.

Spencer smiled hesitantly, watching her. “….But are you though?”

“Yes! Of course, we are. We just got our in-house encyclopedia back and you didn’t expect at least cupcakes? C’mon,” she grabbed his hand and dragged the omega to the round table room, where there were streamers, balloons and all kinds of food on the table.

Spencer blushed deeply, wrapping his arms around his waist. “Oh, thank you. This…this is so sweet,” he sniffled, eyes tearing up slightly.

“Oh no! No tears. Oh no! I made him cry!” Garcia cried out in horror, eyes going wide.

Spencer laughed softly, wiping his eyes. “Happy tears. These are happy tears,” he assured her. “Thank you.”

They all sat around the table, catching up on their lives. Spencer ate one and a half chocolate cupcakes and a few caramels – the most Derek had seen him eat in the weeks they’ve been together.

About halfway through the party, Hotch and Garcia left. They all exchanged glances, knowing that they had another case. Derek glanced worriedly over at Spencer, who smiled brightly at him. Derek was hoping that the first couple of days would be nothing but paperwork for the kid, but serial killers don’t operate on his schedule.

Garcia and Hotch came in a little while later and set up the television after giving them all packets. “Sorry to cut this party short, but there’s a situation in Indianapolis that needs our attention,” Hotch said.

“Situation is correct. Two female omegas were found dumped on the side of Interstate 465 in Indianapolis, Indiana. They were both prostitutes,” Garcia filled them in, flicking to the pictures of the women laying in the grass. There were burns all over their bodies, covering their faces and turning their skin a charred, puckered mess. “Catherine Shaw and Julia Turner had been positively identified by dental records. Catherine was found last Thursday and Julia was found a few hours ago. Indianapolis P.D. called us because they believe these cases are related.”

“Same M.O. It’s probably the same unsub,” Rossi hummed, thumbing through the packet.

“How do we know this isn’t just a vigilante? He grabs prostitutes and kills them and then disposes them where anyone could see them,” Emily cut in, shrugging.

“Because, and this is where it gets absolutely crazy,” Garcia shuddered. “Friday morning, Duke Anderson magically showed up at Methodist Hospital in the center of downtown Indianapolis. He’s the 8-year-old son of Catherine Shaw. He presented with extreme PTSD and burns on his body, though they weren’t as bad as his mom’s, they were probably just from exposure.”

“The unsub also kidnapped the child of one of the prostitutes and made him watch what he was doing to her?” Derek gasped, eyes widening. Garcia nodded solemnly.

“And if I had to place bets, we’re thinking that Julia also had a child,” Rossi nodded.

Garcia nodded, pulling up a picture of a little blonde boy with big blue eyes. “Carter Gilder – he was reported missing by his grandma on Saturday.”

“So this guy dumps the body one day, drops the kid off at the hospital the next day, then kidnaps another kid and mom the next day? No cool off period?” Derek questioned.

“Also, both children have different last names than their mother. They were under someone else’s care. Maybe this guy sees himself as the kid’s savior and he’s saving them from their mom?” Spencer pointed out.

“How could he get away with this? These women are dumped mere feet from the Interstate. Someone must have seen him,” Emily exaggerated.

“Actually, the average speed of cars on I-465 is 72 miles per hour, which is 17 miles over the speed limit. People would see a car pulled over, but they’d be gone before they could fully comprehend what was happening,” Spencer said, pursing his lips.

“So you’re saying our unsub is a local? He would have to know how fast the cars go on such a busy road,” Emily levelled, and Spencer nodded.

“And he’s arrogant,” Derek stated. “He was smug; he knew no one would see him. He’s sadistic too, obviously.”

“And we’re thinking that Julia’s child, Carter, is going to show up to a hospital tomorrow morning?” Rossi asked, glancing over at Hotch.

Hotch nodded. “Which means we need to be there soon. Wheels up in 30.”

\--

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?” Derek asked Spencer for the umpteenth time as the plane took off. He was sitting across from Spencer in the pale chairs, their files in front of them. Spencer glanced up from where he was reading the file again.

He chuckled. “It’s a little late for that. No going back now.”

“I’m just saying –”

Derek was cut off by the rest of the team gathering around them. Hotch started delegating quickly. “It’s only an hour and a half to Indianapolis. As soon as we get there, Morgan and Reid, you head to the M.E. and see what you can find out about the first victim. Prentiss and Rossi will go to the crime scene, and JJ and I will meet up with IPD to see where they’ve gotten.”

They all nodded and went to their corners to work. When they landed, Derek and Spencer climbed into one of the FBI vehicles provided.

“I wonder if the burns were administered postmortem,” Spencer thought aloud. “That would point to remorse – he wanted to make the bodies unidentifiable, so he didn’t have to look at what he’d done.”

“Or maybe the opposite,” Derek pointed out. “Maybe, in his sadistic brain, he thinks they died too quickly and he wanted to keep hurting them, so he set them on fire.”

Spencer hummed, looking out the window.

“Are you okay?” Derek asked after a few moments of silence.

Spencer clenched his jaw. “I’m absolutely fine. I just don’t appreciate you and Hotch ganging up on me and thinking I need a babysitter, when I don’t. I would’ve been just fine going with JJ or Prentiss. I’m not completely reliant on you.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Wonder Boy, what? No one thinks you’re completely reliant on me,” Derek said, to which Spencer rolled his eyes. “Hotch just knows that at this moment in time, you have spent the most time with me and would feel comfortable starting to readjust to your job with me there. As a constant. We aren’t in on anything together.”

“So you didn’t talk to him? You didn’t tell him that I need you or something?” Spencer accused.

And Derek would be damned if that didn’t hurt a little. “No, I didn’t. We both know that you’re your own person. You’re the most independent omega I’ve ever met. I wouldn’t say you need me at all. I didn’t tell Hotch to put us together – he did that on his own. And I’m a little hurt you’d think I’d do something like that.”

Spencer sighed. “I just…” he growled a little under his breath. “I feel like you’re treating me like glass. And I’m not going to break at any moment. I’m fine. I just want to do my job. I don’t need Hotch treating me like glass either.”

“I just want to make sure you’re okay,” Derek pointed out.

“I know. And trust me that if I’m not okay, I’ll tell you,” Spencer snapped fiercely, getting out of the car and walking into the medical examiners office. Derek blinked in surprise but followed after him. They needed to be professional.

Spencer examined Catherine’s body closely, looking at the skin under her nails and the blood on her skin. The burn marks were the worse on her feet, but they were bad everywhere. Her abdomen and thighs were covered with blood.

“Any evidence of sexual assault? It looks like she fought back,” Spencer pointed out. “Have you sent the DNA to be analyzed?”

The M.E. nodded. She was a meek beta, her shoulders straight and blue eyes confident. “Yes, the DNA from under her fingernails are being analyzed as we speak. No evidence of sexual assault. But take a look at the MRI.”

“No sexual assault – do you think we’re looking at a female unsub?” Derek pointed out from his spot on the other side of the room.

Spencer nodded as he examined the MRI scan he was given. “I’d say we’re definitely looking for a female unsub. She removed Catherine’s uterus.”

Derek’s eyes widened.

“What’s the official C.O.D.?” Spencer asked the M.E., who bit her bottom lip.

“That one is tricky. There was a large amount of smoke in her lungs, which made it hard to breathe. Her brain shows signs of shutting down, but the official cause of death is actually blood loss,” she informed them.

“So she was burned alive,” Derek deduced, to which the M.E. nodded.

“The unsub probably performed the hysterectomy and then burned Catherine, so she bled out while being burned,” Spencer said, and the M.E. nodded again. “Would you say that the unsub had medical training?”

The M.E. shook her head. “With the amount of blood and the jagged edges of the cuts made, I’d say someone just carved the uterus out of her.”

Derek and Spencer shared a look before nodding.

\--

“The crime scene was exactly the same as the last one,” Prentiss and Rossi reported when they returned to the IPD office. The team had been given a conference room to work in. JJ and Hotch went to go talk to Catherine Shaw’s son at the hospital shortly after Reid and Morgan got back from the medical examiners.

Spencer was working on his geographic profile – a map of Indianapolis on the wall with his multiple markings. Derek sat at the conference table, reading through the files again. They had barely spoken since the argument in the car and Spencer never met Derek’s eye.

“She was just dumped there by the side of the road,” Prentiss sighed, shoving her hands in her pockets. “The M.E. doesn’t have a C.O.D. yet, but I’m betting it’s the same as victim one.”

The phone rang and Derek picked it up. “What you got for us, Mama?”

“I got everything I could find on Catherine Shaw, Julia Turner and their kids,” Garcia’s name came through the phone. “Catherine was raised by her alcoholic father, who, if her frequent E.R. visits are anything to go by, also abused her. He was incarcerated for bar fighting when she was 12, so she went into the care of her grandmother, who died when she was 15. She was in the system for a few years before being aged out and turning to prostitution. She got pregnant and gave birth and her son is in the care of a Margery Yang, her best friend’s mom. Her best friend, Alana, is also a prostitute and has a daughter, who is under her mom’s care as well.”

“What happened to Catherine’s mom?” Prentiss asked.

“That’s the kicker. She died when Catherine was 4 – brain hemorrhaging,” Garcia punctuated. “Catherine’s dad got a little too rough with her and bam. But he wasn’t able to be tied to her as a murder suspect.”

Derek pursed his lips, nodding. “Okay, baby girl, what about victim #2?”

“Julia Turner! This girl is absolutely wild,” Garcia squealed. “Good family – normal neighborhood. She had a little brother and both of her parents are still alive, even though they haven’t talked in years. In high school, she started doing drugs and hanging out with the stoners. Met a boyfriend, got pregnant, dropped out of high school. Lives with the boyfriend on the south side, became a prostitute after giving birth. He works as a trucker and is in Nebraska, but he’s on his way back. The kid stays with his mom.”

“You said that Julia lives on the south side?” As Garcia’s noise of confirmation, Spencer frowned. “She was found on the west side of 465. Where did her family live?”

“Um….” After a few seconds, Garcia spoke again. “Oh no, they live 10 minutes from the disposal site.”

Spencer marked that on his map. “And where did Catherine live?”

“On the south side, oh no, in the same apartment complex as Julia,” Garcia gasped. After a few typing noises, she was back. “Her dad, before going to prison, also lived on the south side.”

“That’s where she was found. It didn’t look odd before because she was probably abducted around there, but why would the unsub go out of his way to dump Julia’s body 10 minutes away from where her family lives?” Spencer asked.

“To send them a message,” Prentiss supplied.

“But what?” Spencer asked, biting his lip.

“Maybe the unsub is mad at the family’s? Maybe she thinks they didn’t raise the girls right,” Rossi hummed.

They got another call on the line and Derek said goodbye to Garcia before answering Hotch’s call. “Hey, guys, we’re heading to the hotel from the hospital. It’s really late and we don’t have much more to do other than wait to see if Carter shows up tomorrow.”

“What did you learn from the little boy?” Derek asked.

“She’s really shaken up – he wouldn’t say something,” JJ sighed.

They all exchanged sad looks. “Alright. We’ll meet you at the hotel.”

\--

Derek was getting ready for bed when he heard a knock on his hotel room door. He was surprised to see Reid standing there, wearing Derek’s gray Northwestern shirt and sweatpants. His arms were wrapped around his waist and he had his glasses on.

“I’m sorry for snapping at you earlier,” he said quickly, looking down at his socked feet. “I just get frustrated. And I shouldn’t take it out on you. You’re just trying to help.”

Derek watched him curiously for a moment before sighing. “No, kid, I was out of line. You’re grown and you can take care of yourself. I know I’ve been a little overprotective,” Spencer snorted. “and I will try to back off.”

After a few moments, Spencer frowned. “I mean…sometimes I like it,” he murmured, kicking out his foot.

“What?” Derek blanched.

“Sometimes…I like it when you’re overprotective. It makes me feel…safe,” Spencer murmured, shrinking in on himself further.

Derek watched him before glancing down the hallway. “How about you come inside? Do you wanna…you can stay the night in here. I can take the couch if you’d like,” Derek offered.

Spencer finally glanced up at him and seemed to lose his train of thought, eyes trained on Derek’s bare chest. His mouth opened just slightly in awe. That made Derek’s alpha preen. “I can cover up, if you’d like,” he offered, knowing full well that neither of them wanted that.

“No! No, you don’t have to,” Spencer sighed, plopping on the edge of his bed. He put his face in his hands. “This is hard.”

Derek frowned, seeing Spencer’s hands shake. He sat down next to him. “What’s going on in your brain, Pretty Boy?”

Spencer paused, blinking up at him. Derek saw tears in his eyes. “Do you really think I’m pretty?”

Derek blinked a few times. That was not what he was expecting. “I…I mean, yeah. Isn’t it obvious? You’re gorgeous.”

Spencer scoffed softly. “But you see so many omegas. So many of them are prettier than me and fitter than me and not all weird and female and – “

“Hey, hey, what are you talking about, kid?” Derek calmed him down.

Spencer sniffled, wiping his eyes. “How can you think I’m pretty when compared to them? What am I to them?”

“To who?”

“All the other omegas you mess around with. You could have anyone you want. You’re the perfect alpha – you’re strong and passionate and dedicated and gorgeous and so sweet and – “

“I haven’t messed with any other omega since you’ve been back,” Derek pointed out, trying to ignore how Spencer called him ‘perfect’.

Spencer sniffled. “Because you’ve been stuck babysitting me.”

“Stuck? Spence, listen. JJ and Garcia – they begged me to let them take over. But I said no. I wanted to be with you. It drives me crazy when we’re apart. Even in two separate hotel rooms – I was worried about what might happen to you,” Derek told him.

Spencer scoffed. “Because I’m helpless?”

“No because I love you,” Derek blurted out, like it was obvious.

Spencer startled, wide eyes flicking to meet Derek’s. Both their mouths hung open in shock, Derek’s shock about his own proclamation and Spencer’s shock about hearing it. “Why?” Spencer whispered finally.

“Why?” Derek laughed softly. “Because you’re amazing. You’re strong and independent and beautiful and so crazy smart. You’re perfect.”

“I’m not perfect,” Spencer murmured, glancing down. “Why would an alpha like you want an omega like me? I’m broken.”

“Hey, no. You’re not broken,” Derek insisted, eyebrows furrowing. “You went through something that made you stronger. Did you think that I was broken after what Carl Buford did to me?” At the immediate shake of Spencer’s head, Derek continued. “I have loved you for years. I just had no idea what it was. I thought it was normal alpha/omega behavior until I realized that I never felt the way I feel about you about any other omega. I didn’t worry when I couldn’t see them for two seconds. I didn’t think about them and miss them when they left the room. I didn’t even try to show off around them.”

“Did you show off around me?” Spencer asked, voice small.

Derek chuckled. “Of course. I wouldn’t even realize I was doing it. And walking around with you, when you would press yourself to me, I was proud because people thought I was yours and…and I want that. I would be proud if you were my mate. I love you so – “

He was cut off by Spencer’s lips firmly pressing against his. Derek gasped as Spencer’s arms wrapped around his neck. “I love you,” Spencer whispered against his lips before pressing another kiss to them.

Derek stared at him in awe. “Really?” He breathed out.

Spencer nodded, smiling. There were still tears in his eyes, but Derek suspects that they were happy tears this time. “I love you so much,” he whispered.

Derek grinned, kissing him deeply. “I love you too.”


	8. Chapter 8

Everyone knew as soon as the duo arrived at the police department. Either because they smelled like each other, or because of how in sync they seemed. Derek walked with Spencer to the conference room and sat by him during the morning briefing. Afterwards, Spencer returned to his map and files. Derek brought him coffee, making the boy blush.

Spencer pursed his lips when he looked at his files. “Hey, Derek – “ he started to say, but Derek was pressing a pen into his hands like he knew what Spencer was going to ask.

Prentiss watched them; eyebrows raised.

Hotch poked his head into the conference room. “The M.E. has a cause of death for the second victim. Reid, can you join JJ and head over there?” Spencer nodded, setting down his markers. “And the victim’s son just showed up at the same hospital that the other little boy – Prentiss and Rossi: can you head over there and see if he’ll talk? And victim #2’s boyfriend is in the interrogation room – Derek, can you interview him?”

Derek nodded, glancing over at Spencer. The omega gave him a reassuring smile before leaving the room to look for JJ. Derek gathered his files and took a deep breath. Spencer was going to be fine.

“So…” Emily trailed off, staring at him pointedly.

“So…” Derek repeated.

Emily scoffed. “Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about. Did you and Reid finally talk it out?”

“Talk what out?”

“The fact that you’re in love with each other!” Emily jogged his memory.

“How’d you know about that?” Derek asked, gaping.

Emily rolled her eyes. “It would’ve been more subtle if you went over and peed on him. But good luck, congratulations, don’t hurt him. I have places to be,” she waved her hand and was gone in an instant, off to do as Hotch said.

Derek flushed with embarrassment, biting his bottom lip. Were they that obvious? He shook that out of his head before going to interview the boyfriend.

\--

“He said there was nothing odd about her. She’s a prostitute, but she’s safe about it,” Derek reported to the team.

JJ hummed. “But how safe can you be?”

“These victims are not related at all. Aside from both being moms and prostitutes, they worked in two completely separate areas and they never contacted each other,” Derek pointed out.

“Maybe they’re victims of opportunity – they’re prostitutes so they’re easy to pick up,” JJ suggested.

“But how would the unsub know that they have sons?”

“So she stalks them – finds out about their kids and then pretends to pick them up and kidnaps them,” JJ concluded.

“The M.E. said cause of death was also blood loss for Julia. Her uterus had been removed and she was burned alive,” Spencer reported from his spot at the table next to Derek. He blinked around, taking in all the new information.

The phone started ringing and Hotch answered it. “The kid said some interesting stuff,” Emily’s voice crackled through the speaker. “He said that the person who took him was a woman a little older than his mom, so I’m guessing thirties. She had burns on the side of her face.”

“Garcia, looks for female burn victims in the area age 25-40,” Hotch ordered the tech, who was currently Skyped onto the television. She nodded and started typing.

“30 names,” she reported.

“Narrow it down to blondes with burns on their faces,” Rossi instructed through the phone.

“7 names,” Garcia called out.

“Add in mothers. She told Catherine’s son that she was helping him by doing what she was doing, and she’s only taking moms who have little boys, so look for women with sons. The removal of the uterus could be a sign that she lost the child, or he died,” Emily said.

“Both the sons of the victims were 8 years old – that might be how old her son was when he died,” Derek pointed out.

“Oh I got something!” Garcia shouted. “Laura Pinsel. Burn marks on the side of her face, blonde, 34. She’s lived in Indianapolis her whole life and had an 8-year-old son who got hit by a car on 465 and died.”

“That’s why she’s dumping the body on the side of the road. That’s probably where they found her son,” Spencer said. “Garcia, do you have an address?”

“Yes, I am sending it to your phones right now!” Garcia said.

“Well, we need to find her right now. Another woman just went missing,” Hotch said, glancing up from his phone. “Garcia, find out where Christina Langley’s son is right now. JJ and Reid, you go get the boy and bring him back here. We can’t have her taking the kid.” JJ and Spencer quickly nodded and ran out of the room. Derek watched after him, but he was shook out of his stupor by Hotch’s voice. “Derek, Emily, and I will go to her house.”

\--

The house was completely empty. They scoured the entire place multiple times, but nothing was out of place. It’s like no one lived there. Halfway through their search, Spencer called them saying that Christina’s son was at school, according to the grandmother, and they were on their way to pick him up.

The trio hauled back into the car and called Garcia. “Guys, listen to this,” she sighed. “Laura married her high school sweetheart right before he shipped off to Afghanistan. She gave birth to a boy and when her son, Malcolm, was 4, her husband was killed in duty. She disappeared when her son was 8 – just plucked off the streets. She was severely burned and claimed that a few men had held her captive and burned her and then just let her go,”

“Shit,” Derek muttered.

“Oh, no, no, no: here’s the worst part,” Garcia took a deep breath. “When she got back, she found out that her son had died. He was staying with his grandmother and their car broke down on the side of 465 and he wandered off a little too much and got hit. The car that hit him just sped off and nothing was found.”

“Oh, god,” Emily groaned from her spot in the backseat.

"So she thinks she's protecting the son's because they're seeing what’s happening to their moms. She’s using the boys as surrogates to act out what she wishes would've happened. She wishes her son was with her the whole time,” Hotch supplied.

"She probably blames herself for his death because she wasn’t around,” Derek said.

"She probably kills the women out of self-loading and uses them as a surrogate for herself,” Emily cut in.

"Garcia, did they ever find the guys that burned her?" Hotch asked.

"Um, no, unfortunately. And she got real messed up from it – of course she did. Anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, PTSD, some serious meds.”

“She’s probably suffering from a psychotic break,” Emily sighed.

"She wasn’t at the address you gave, so she probably has a secondary location,” Hotch said.

Derek’s eyes widened. “Hey, mama, in her report of the incident, did she tell the police where the men took her?"

"Yes! A warehouse on Michigan St. The police searched the entire warehouse, but there was no traces of fire or anything. It’s been abandoned for years.”

"That's probably where she's taking her victims too - to live out the fantasy,” Emily said.

"What's the address of the warehouse?" 

"It's on your phones right now!"

Hotch nodded, pulling it up. “It’s closer to Reid and JJ – they can beat us there.”

“They’ll be hurt!” Derek immediately protested.

Hotch shot him a look. “They’ll be fine. They’ve done this before.”

“Spencer hasn’t been here for over a year! You can’t send him into the line of fire!”

“Reid and JJ are this woman and her son’s only hope. By the time we get there – it might be too late,” Hotch growled, his alpha tone slipping in. Derek shut up with a growl and glared out the window.

Hotch hung up on Garcia and called Reid. “Christina Langley’s son wasn’t at school. He was apparently picked up by a woman who claimed to be Christina’s sister about an hour ago,” Spencer said immediately.

“We know where they took them – Garcia sent the address to you two. You’re closer than we are, so we’ll meet you there,” Hotch said.

Spencer confirmed before hanging up. Derek took a deep breath and looked out his window. This is the exact opposite of what he wanted to happen.

\--

When they arrived at the warehouse, JJ and Reid’s vehicle was already there, as well as a few cop cars and medical personnel. Derek jumped out of the SUV and ran to the captain of IPD. “Where’s our guys?” he asked immediately.

“Inside. They got the kid out, but – “ before he could complete his thought, Derek was running to the entrance of the warehouse, gun drawn and ready.

“Morgan!” He heard Hotch bark behind him, but he could only focus on one thing – his omega being in a warehouse with a woman who was having a psychotic break.

“You don’t understand!!” a woman screamed. Derek followed the voices to an open spot in the warehouse. He ducked below some sheet metal to remain undetected. JJ had her hands in the air while Spencer aimed his gun at the two women in the center of the room. Laura had a gun to Christina’s neck, Christina tied to a chair. Laura hid behind her so neither of the agents would have a good shot. “You don’t understand what it’s like!!” Laura shrieked.

“No, I don’t understand,” JJ reasoned, voice level. “But I can imagine. I have a little boy – he’s only two.”

Laura glared at her, eyes going wide. “You – you have a son?” At JJ’s nod, Laura sneered. “You have a son who’s alive and instead of being with him, you’re here! You – “ Laura roared, raising the gun to point at JJ.

“No!” Derek yelled, jumping out of his hiding spot.

A gun went off.

Laura fell to the ground, a hole in her forehead. Spencer poised his gun and moved closer to them, stepping over Laura and checking her pulse. He sighed, shaking his head at JJ. JJ untied Christina, who was crying. Derek ran over to make sure they were okay and he saw Spencer’s hands shaking.

Reid and JJ helped Christina out and to an ambulance. They sent medical professionals into the building to retrieve Laura’s body. Christina hugged her son, holding him close at the back of an ambulance.

Spencer and JJ leaned against their car, breathing heavily. Spencer closed his eyes, his hands still shaking. “Reid?” Derek asked softly, walking over to him.

Spencer blinked up at him, tears in his eyes. “I killed her,” he cried softly, wrapping his arms around Derek’s waist and hiding in his chest.

Derek shushed him quietly and ran his finger’s through his hair. “You had to – no, Babyboy. She was going to shoot JJ – you had to. You saved JJ’s life. And the life of that woman in there.”

Spencer sniffled, shaking. “I’m just in shock,” he choked out. “I’m not normally this emotional.”

Derek chuckled, knowing full well that ever since he came back, the omega had been nothing but a roller coaster of emotion. “That’s okay,” he soothed him.

\--

On the plane ride home, Derek and Spencer took the couch. Spencer was napping, his head in Derek’s lap. He was in deep EH – this was the calmest he’s been since the incident. He needed this release. Derek stroked his fingertips down Spencer’s side, making the omega purr loudly. He’d be so embarrassed if he knew he had purred and curled up like a kitten in front of the whole team.

“So like is this a thing now?” JJ asked, pointing to the both of them. “I mean, we’ve been waiting.”

Derek smiled softly and looked down at Spencer. “Yeah…it’s a thing now.”

“We’re going to have to talk about you running into buildings against orders because of this though,” Hotch said. “This is a dangerous job and you’re going to have to accept that Spencer can take care of himself. You’re going to be separated sometimes.”

Derek nodded. It was hard to hear, but it was the truth. Spencer could handle himself. And if he needed Derek, he’d tell him, like he did after the incident.

“I really love him,” Derek whispered, looking down at the sleeping omega.

“Awwww,” Emily cooed, making kissing noises.

“Well, mazel tov!” Rossi exclaimed. “Hopefully it works out for you like it didn’t for me three times.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SMUT -- also this is over! Thank you for anyone who read this and loved this. I've never gotten this good of feedback on a work so thank you all so much!

The next few months were bliss. Derek and Spencer mated and moved into Spencer’s apartment. They knew they’ve have to move into a bigger place once they had kids, but that wasn’t exactly on the radar. They worked together effortlessly, their minds and bodies so in sync that they didn’t even have to ask each other what they wanted. They just knew.

There had been a few bumps; like when Spencer was held at gun point by a serial killer, and when Derek ran back into a burning building to save a kid, but overall they were happy and healthy. They came home from cases at the same time and crawled into bed together.

They had just gotten home from a hard one – a pedophile turned serial killer in Oregon. Spencer took off his khakis and sweater and burrowed in their bed – their nest. Derek smiled fondly and took off his shirt. He changed into basketball shorts before joining Spencer. Spencer whined quietly, nuzzling into Derek’s chest.

“What if…what if something happens to our pups?” he asked softly, voice small.

Derek sighed. “Nothing will ever happen to them. They have two FBI agents as parents.”  
  


“But that makes them a target. They could be used as bait to take the entire team down,” Spencer pointed out.

Derek frowned. “Do you not want to have kids?”

Spencer immediately shook his head. “I wanna have kids so bad,” he whispered.

“Then do you wanna quit our jobs?”

“No! No, I worked way too hard and we both love our jobs so so much,” Spencer gasped.

“Then we will just play it by ear. Hotch has a son, JJ has a son, who knows how many kids Rossi has,” Spencer giggled. “They’ll be okay, Babyboy.” Derek smiled, pressing a kiss to Spencer’s forehead.

Spencer smiled fondly. “You’ll be a great dad,” he hummed.

Derek hummed, rolling over so he was hovering above Spencer. The omega bit his bottom lip. “You’ll be an amazing mom.”

Spencer scrunched up his nose. “No one’s calling me mom, no way,” he declared. “I can be Papa or something.”

“No, Papa doesn’t suit you,” Derek disagreed, kissing over the skin of Spencer’s mating bite. Spencer shivered, a small gasp leaving his lips. His legs spread instinctively. “I think Ma does though.”

“Y-yeah?” Spencer stuttered out, eyes going wide, his pupils dilated.

Derek pressed another kiss to his mating bite before licking over it, starting to suck a lovebite right over the sensitive skin. Spencer quivered, small pleasurable noises leaving his lips. “Please,” he whined.

“Wanna make a baby?” Derek growled, pulling away to look at Spencer’s face. He already looked fucked out.

“Y-yes,” he whined, rocking his hips up against Derek. “Breed me.”

“Fuck,” Derek groaned, dropping his head to kiss Spencer roughly. The omega wrapped his arms around Derek’s shoulders, pulling him closer. Derek pressed his hardness against Spencer’s thigh, grinding to get some relief. He had started getting hard as soon as the omega mentioned kids. The idea of breeding his boy, keeping him full of him. Everyone would know that he’s Derek’s.

“Alpha,” Spencer keened, shifting his slick hips against Derek’s. “Need you.”

Derek got to quick work, taking off his shorts and pulling off Spencer’s shirt. He couldn’t resist the omega’s milky skin and started sucking bites down his chest, laving his tongue around each of Spencer’s nipples in the way that he knew made Spencer’s mind spin with pleasure. He pressed a finger into Spencer’s entrance, already slick and open for him.

“Such a good omega,” Derek rumbled his approval, swooping up to capture Spencer’s lips in a kiss. Spencer practically cried out when he felt the tip of Derek’s cock nudge against his entrance. He rocked his hips back, trying to get more of it in. “Look at you, gagging for it,” Derek bit rough lovebites into the column of his neck as he pressed inside.

Spencer gasped, arching his back. He scratched his nails down Derek’s back, moaned out loudly as he started to build a rhythm, properly fucking him into the mattress.

“Gonna knot you so good,” Derek groaned into Spencer’s mouth, to which the omega nodded enthusiastically. “What? You want that, Babyboy?” Spencer keened, jaw slack and throat unable to produce words. He panted, rocking his hips back against Derek’s hips. As soon as Derek hit his prostate, Spencer was seeing stars. He moaned out loudly, throwing his head back against the pillows.

“Oh, please!” He drawled out, reaching out for anything to hold onto. He twisted his hands in the sheets, gasping and moaning. “Alpha, please…’m so close,” he begged.

“That’s okay, baby,” Derek growled. “I don’t plan on stopping until you come at least twice.”

Spencer whimpered, eyes closing. He rocked his hips faster, gasping out before he was coming untouched in between them. Derek didn’t stop, fucking him through the oversensitivity until his cock filled out again and it became pleasure. Spencer gasped, hiding his face in Derek’s neck. He mouthed at his mating bite, making jolts of pleasure shoot down Derek’s spine.

“Fuck, I’m close,” Derek groaned, feeling his knot begin to swell.

“Knot me, please, Alpha, please, I need…” Spencer begged, working his hand over his cock. He rocked his hips back into Derek’s and they came together, Derek burying his knot deep in the omega and Spencer painting his chest white for a second time. They caught their breath, breathing heavily and panting to catch up.

After calming down, Derek rolled them over so Spencer could lay on his chest while they waited for his knot to go down.

“Y’know how I knew you really loved me?” Spencer slurred sleepily; his head settled on Derek’s chest. He was swirling his fingertips all over Derek’s chest and abs, tracing the lines of his muscles.

“How?”

“When you were telling me how much you loved me, you said that you were proud to have people think you were mine,” Spencer yawned. “Most alphas don’t like being claimed as an omega’s; it’s an omega who is an alpha’s property.”

“But we’re equals,” Derek stated.

“And that’s how I knew that you were my soulmate,” Spencer grinned lazily, pressing a kiss to the back of Derek’s knuckles.

“I love you so much,” Derek whispered in awe.

Spencer smiled up at him, his kiss-bitten lips stretched wide and his hazy eyes set on Derek’s. “I love you too.”


End file.
